Mindless Moments

Girl reading magI was really looking for a mindless moment.  Nothing like a pedicure for drifting away and maybe it would also urge flip-flop weather along.  I took my seat in the comfy massage chair, dipped my feet in to the really warm water and picked up a woman’s magazine.  Ahhhhh.

My intention was to draw out this mindless relaxation.  So I started at the very beginning of the magazine – Letter from the Editor.  And I didn’t get one page further. 

May 2014, More Magazine.  Lesley Jane Seymour submitted her Letter From the Editor (a piece that I cannot find a link for, so I’m going to quote most of it because it was so good).  As her story goes, she was at just another Women’s Issues Conference when she was stuck by a presentation called “The Heart of the Matter – What is your Question?”  Here’s my edited version of what she wrote:

I sat in the front row with my arms crossed as the moderator asked the six women onstage to share the one question “you are never tired of asking and will never know the answer to.”  One panelist said her question is, ”How do I live a life with purpose?” A dietitian asked “What does healthy feel like?”….In a room full of women who all carried the burden of being the answerer-in-chief at home and/or in the office, the joy of asking a question for which you did not need to produce an answer was palpable.

Your question should be fascinating to you-so much so, says [Laurie] Patton, that “no matter where you land and what you do with your life, you will always focus on your question.”  …It’s really important to understand, however, that you’ll never come to the end of the question.  That’s not even the goal.  “A sense of purpose is not a sense of conclusion, of finishing.” Patton says.  Instead, it is “a sense of being happy with forever being a seeker.”

I think we should all gather our friends, put some drinks on the table and ask one another, ”What is your question?”

I put down the magazine and sat and sat and sat.  My mindless moment had become a project (that is so like me!) to figure out my question.  It didn’t come right away, and my pedicure was over.  But I was stuck – I didn’t have my question and I didn’t want to lose track of this idea, so I ignored my moral compass and ripped that article out and shoved it in my purse.

I’ve pulled it out a few times and the other day the question came to me.  And I know it’s the right question because it is reflected in every phase of my life – even now.  My question?  Do you really want to know?  It’s “What’s Next?”   For better or for worse – that’s my question.

I hope you will follow Ms. Seymour’s advice and gather some friends, put some drinks on the table and ask each other “What is your question?

Here are some More readers’ questions:  http://www.more.com/question

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6 Responses to Mindless Moments

  1. Lynda McGrath says:

    My question is …..What are my options? I am a maximizer ….I consider all the options before making a decision. When I go out to eat, I study the entire menu before before making a selection. If a friend shares a problem, I like developing the options. At times I even offer my family unsolicited advice so they know their options.

    • Debbie Hoke says:

      Lynda-did you know your question right away or have to think about it awhile?

      • Lynda says:

        When you posed the question, I knew my question right away. Earlier this year on a flight to Florida, I was mulling over a few issues, and I started jotting down notes. Almost absentmindedly, I wrote “What are my options/WAMO” at the top of the page. Now wamo is a new verb in our family – Enough wamoing, make a decision.

  2. Lisa Alecci says:

    My question is: How do I use my passions to make a difference in this world? Is that too long?!

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